Change Is Tough, But So Are You

Many people have a difficult time committing to growth and addressing their mental health needs because of the changes that are required. While change is hard, it’s part of life and something we need to face—especially when our mental health is on the line. Here are four reasons you might be resistant to growth and change and why you should still push forward.

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1. Creatures of Habit

We are creatures of habit, and we find comfort in these habits because they offer us a level of familiarity, predictability, and control. Our routines, systems, and ways of doing things are nice, especially in times of hardship or stress, because they become a constant and give our lives some semblance of normalcy. So, when we are considering change, it can feel like we are moving in uncharted waters. Change requires us to do something new and different. And even if we are aware that this change is “good” or in our best interest, it can be scary because of the uncertainty. While this fear of the unknown is normal, it’s important for us to push through. Our brains are malleable, and we have the strength and resiliency to break old habits and develop new ones.

2. The Work

Change often involves unlearning old habits and patterns of behavior that we have been engaging in for a very long time—and this means we have to work at it. While we have the capacity to do hard things and grow, changing a behavior requires practice and patience. You cannot expect perfection or for changes to take place overnight—and this part can be incredibly frustrating. We like things to be easy and seamless, but, as with all new skills, there is going to be a learning curve and moments of discomfort. You are going to “mess up” and even go back to old patterns sometimes, but this doesn’t take away from your effort and the fact that you are still moving forward and in a different direction. Expect things to be messy and uncomfortable.

3. Fear of Loss

Part of growth and pursuing healing often results in changes in our relationships. When you actually start doing the work—prioritizing your mental health and wellness—you become more reflective and aware of unhealthy behaviors and relational dynamics. You’ll start to notice how certain relationships only thrive when there is stagnation or when you don’t challenge the status quo. And, as a result, you might start to feel as though you have outgrown some of your relationships or that certain relationships are at odds with your goals and values and maybe even detrimental to your well-being.

It’s this aspect of change and commitment to growth that can be the most difficult, as there are some real potential consequences including pushback and protesting from the people we love and care about or loss of a friend or meaningful relationship. However, it’s important to remember that we all deserve relationships that are supportive and uplifting—to have people in our lives who respect our autonomy and the decisions we make. The right people will always stand in your corner.

4. Time and Energy

Doing the work can often feel like a timesuck—especially when we see this use of time as time that we could be doing other, more “productive” things. Whether it’s going to therapy, building new habits, or engaging in healthy activities—the commitment to growth and mental wellness can feel like a big undertaking. And the truth of the matter is, making big life changes and focusing on our mental health is an investment and does require both time and energy. It requires some level of sacrifice and moving things around—which can definitely be a task in and of itself and extremely overwhelming.

However, investing in your mental health is crucial to your quality of life. And when you commit to the work and to making the changes you need to make, you will notice the positive and lasting effects it has in other areas of your life. So, if you’re struggling to find the time and energy, remind yourself of your “why” and keep in mind the bigger picture. Whether it is cutting back on screen time or deciding to wake up 20 minutes earlier every morning, I am confident that you will be able to find at least 30 to 60 minutes a day to invest in you.